Star Wars: The Force Awakens Teaser Trailer, A Penny For My Thoughts. (Expanded and Revised Edition)

I watched the teaser trailer. I think I may be just the tiniest bit excited now. The whole two handed lightsabre is quite the topic. I mean, it is a zweihander after all.

:14 Is that Benedict Cumberbatch. Well isn’t he the hairy pate Patrick Stewart of 2014! It could be Max von Sydow. I am certain it isn’t Gilbert Godfrey. Although, when the trailer for Spaceballs 2 is released…

:22 “We ain’t found shit!” This is a Spaceballs reference. I also thought that this could be the guy that awoke from dreaming episodes 1-3. Which would be the easiest way to get out of that whole mess and act like nothing happened.

:43 Bocephus-Earl Porkins! Jek’s son is out for revenge. If yes, I am definitely in!

:45 Yeah, this is for sure the official trailer. Hashtag first ten minutes of Star Trek Into Darkness all over again.

:54 HOLY SHIT! A light zweihander! Ermahgerd! Looks amazing! Why didn’t I think of that? Oh yeah, cuz it is a bad idea. Made by the same asshole who thought putting tanks on four, three storey tall legs, was a great idea. In a galaxy far far away. Where form does not follow function. Also, why is sithhead only using one hand for a two handed weapon? Great shot, bad form.

1:00 Yay, the Millennium Falcon is flying! This is great!

1:01 Jesus I am going to blow chunks in the theatre!

1:05 Wait, it isn’t going into space. [Thinks back to :45] Has gravitational force become so strong that ships can’t get off the ground? Have all FTL/Warp/Hyperspace/Floppy drives been replaced with fuel efficient land cruiser engines?

1:09 [Thinks back to :54] Seriously, sithhead is going to get hurt. Darth Stubs does not sound intimidating. Why not broaden up lasery light part a bit and use a “super resistant metal” for the hilt. Sure it would have to be repaired from time to time, but that is life. Taking a lazer sward to a blacksmith sounds more viable that chopping off your hands. Apparently this guy hasn’t seen Astar . Or maybe he is Astar-like! In which case screw my entire argument, that is an awesome light zweihander.

What are your thoughts? Leave them in the comments below.

3 thoughts on “Star Wars: The Force Awakens Teaser Trailer, A Penny For My Thoughts. (Expanded and Revised Edition)

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