I Bought A Mouse And Gained A Kindred Spirit Acquaintance: Chad


I Bought A Mouse.

I bought a mouse over the weekend. After six years, two of which involved a lot of false double clicks, I pitched my Razer Naga and bought a Logitech M720 A.K.A Triathlon. I realized that I wasn’t so much into gaming mice anymore. While I do play games on my PC, I don’t think I necessitate a mouse devoted to gaming. Basically, don’t require a mouse that resembles dung beetle Transformer named Shithouse* that was living proof that a disco ball fucked an Atari.

The Technobabble Was Free.

Back to my new sweet wireless mouse that has the unifying receiver and Bluetooth connectivity. First, the unifying receiver allows me to hook up six compatible devices to one receiver. That’s more than I need, but the ability to free up USB ports is always welcome. Then there is the Bluetooth which allows the mouse to be hooked up to three devices at the same time. With the simple push of a button, the active device is switched out and the cursor jumps to the next device’s screen.

The real kicker, files can be copied from device to device with the mouse. Make it active on one device, grab a file, hit the button, and hit paste on the next device. Done!

Then There He Was…

When I walked into the store I had two mice in mind, the Triathlon and the Marathon. Both were wireless and had years on one battery charge. The Marathon didn’t have Bluetooth, but it was cheaper. I found them both out on display where I could see how they felt and looked. I’d managed to check-out both before hearing, “Can I help you.”

My soul rolled it’ eyes. I figured it was some kid who didn’t really care what I said next. His manager had probably forced him to talk to me and was watching him. I turned around and there he was, Chad.

At Least That’s What His Name Tag Said.

Chad was excited and super helpful. He knew everything about the two mice in question and many things about everything else in that aisle. It should be noted that Chad knew all of this even though he broke his wrist and was now relegated to the exclusive use of mice with trackballs.

How do I know that he broke his wrist by falling down some stairs and that his brother sustained less severe injuries from a car accident? Do I really need to spell it out for you? Chad and I kindred spirits acquaintances on the same journey to find the input devices that best suit our needs!

Will We Meet Again?

While I don’t think Chad and I will ever meet on top of the Empire State Building at midnight with our favorite input devices** or anything. I think there is a chance that we will meet again.

You see, I think keyboards and mice are the bee’s knees. Out of those two, keyboards are the bee’s knees-i-est. I have several keyboards that I swap out from time to time.There’s my eleven year old main one from The Source and the gaming one. Plus a few randos, because you never know.

While looking at mice, I have to admit, I also stole a peek at keyboards. Chad told me all about them as well. Until the gentle nudge of a text saying, “Where are you?” brought me crashing back into reality from an input device euphoria.

I love my wife and my eleven year old Centrios keyboard, but man, those wireless, waterproof, multi-device Logitech keyboards sure did intrigue me. See you soon, Chad.

 


To my wife, I apologize. Not for Chad, but for wanting to buy another keyboard. Never for Chad.

*In all honesty, Shithouse would have been a Go-Bot.

**Hootie-hoo!

 

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More PC More Problems

My friend, Machismo Wainwright, recently gifted me a copy of Fallout 4. I had been playing Fallout 3 and Fallout New Vegas a lot lately and he knew I was a big fan. What he didn’t know was the reason why I hadn’t procured my own copy of Fallout 4. My computer was underwhelming and doesn’t meet the minimum requirements. It is something I didn’t real bring up much in conversation. Seriously, who wants to talk about inadequacies on a coffee break.

Since then Machismo has been trying to help me find a new graphics card. Lo and behold another friend, Jonesboro McClintock, came to my rescue. All I had to do was buy him a lunch or two and he would give me his old GTX 580. It is certainly a big beefy card. A card that is the size of something one would get at a U.S. fast food restaurant. Superduper sized, doubled up and bedazzled. Easily more than twice the size of my current card.

Once Jonesboro had heard that my powersupply wouldn’t support this new supreme being of a card, he even threw in an old power supply. He and I ran through the checklist of everything that could go wrong when making the switch. We thought of everything. The wattage, the pins and cables, the general size of the card. I had the new card all but in when one problem we hadn’t thought about popped up. My SATA cables are right under the graphics card. This new one sits right on them. So much so that it tips. I didn’t push it into my PCIe slot any further .

So how the hell did I wind up in this position. For starters I have traditionally been a console gamer. They are easy and I like the controllers. However, I have gotten tired of buying new consoles and having to buy all new stuff. I just don’t want that hassle. So I started switching over to PC gaming. Albeit slowly.

My current PC is a Dell. I know, I know. It won’t happen again. Money was a bit tight when I bought it and I needed a new PC at the time. The financing was really appealing back then too. Before this, for whatever reason, I had bought an iMac. I know, how did I have money for a Mac, but not for something that wasn’t a Dell? Beats the shit outta me. I had succumbed to advertising. My wife had one. They looked great and fun and it was, for awhile. So is being a lesbian in university*!

Eventually I had to get back to doing actual work. That is when I bought the Dell. Honestly, it hasn’t been bad except in the last year. Dell is kind of a strange mishmash of quality parts and cheap parts. They also seem to have a design team whose job is to ensure you can’t upgrade the thing easily. Well fire that team because my PC may be stuffed like a Thanksgiving Turkey, but I can play Fallout 4! All it took were some ninety degree SATA cables.

 

*There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a lesbian after university.